Lesson for the parents of the 6 florida girls...
Websites do not 'make' people do things. Myspace/youtube/facebook/googlevideo have nothing to do with the actions of your children. You do. Youtube may have provided a place for them to post the video, the slander may have been written on myspace. But you know what? The slander on myspace isn't caused by myspace. Youtube doesn't hold the cameras, pay for the footage, or influence the content people create to upload outside of it's general guidelines.
Girls have been putting each other down since before you were born. Myspace is simply the most recent format. Before this it was slam books. Girls that grew up in the nineties know what I'm talking about. A book passed around the school with pictures of different girls and nasty little tidbits written about them. At my school, I'm pretty sure several girls went home early on a number of a occasions because of what was written. Around the time of columbine, it was 'hit lists'. Lists of the people that some tormented students would come after if they ever got the guts to bring a gun to school.
The problem is not the websites, the problem is the way we as a society have started to raise our children. We no longer teach that a child should be polite. Instead, we elect to let them 'express themselves' down the grocery aisle, or set a horrendous example by getting into a screaming match with them. Teach your kids not to behave by being a what not to do? Brilliant plan. Next week take them to the zoo, and show them what not to do around the lion cage...for example, climbing in...
I've never ascribed to spare the rod spoil the child, but I've started to notice that too many parents don't know how to control their children while sparing the rod. That cliche didn't become popular because children actually needed to be beaten, it became popular because parents don't know how to parent, and it's really starting to show in today's children. Namely, yours.
I hope you are making their lives miserable right now, and I cannot believe that everyone of you actually bailed your child out, (or worse, got Dr. Phil to do it for you). You obviously haven't taught your children consequences. They have beaten someone to a pulp. Knocking her unconscious, battering her face, driving off with her and dropping a girl who was completely unrecognisable off on a strange street and telling her to keep her mouth shut. Then, upon being arrested, one of them was stupid enough to ask if she would make it to cheer the next day?
That shows a complete lack of understanding as to the severity of what she had just done. She literally did not think she would get in trouble for putting someone in the hospital. She did not see her behaviour as wrong. Mercades went so far as to have a website dedicated to the crime. Bragging about doing something so terrible. I know you are surrounded by condemn for your daughters actions, and personally I think you ought to realise that there is a reason people are disgusted by what you have raised your little girl to be.
You may love her, but you need to see that her actions deserve retribution. That she needs to be taught a lesson. This time your daughters are fortunate in that no one ended up dead. But what they have just done will affect them for the rest of their lives. Imagine applying to college with that on your record. Better yet, getting a job. Employers now google the names of applicants to see what their 'online persona' is. No one is going to hire the girl that bloodied a varsity cheerleader over nothing more than a couple nasty comments.
Love your child, tell them that you understand that they don't like the consequences. But remind them that it is their actions that got them into this position. Do not give your support for what they did to Victoria. Remind them always that it was a terrible thing, that they should regret. Right now they especially need a dose of humility. If your condemn isn't enough, have them listen to the phone calls that you are receiving. I'm sure that there are dozens of people contacting you to tell you what they think. Maybe after hearing what the nation thinks of their behaviour they'll begin to understand what they have done, and god willing, feel an appropriate amount of remorse.
Girls have been putting each other down since before you were born. Myspace is simply the most recent format. Before this it was slam books. Girls that grew up in the nineties know what I'm talking about. A book passed around the school with pictures of different girls and nasty little tidbits written about them. At my school, I'm pretty sure several girls went home early on a number of a occasions because of what was written. Around the time of columbine, it was 'hit lists'. Lists of the people that some tormented students would come after if they ever got the guts to bring a gun to school.
The problem is not the websites, the problem is the way we as a society have started to raise our children. We no longer teach that a child should be polite. Instead, we elect to let them 'express themselves' down the grocery aisle, or set a horrendous example by getting into a screaming match with them. Teach your kids not to behave by being a what not to do? Brilliant plan. Next week take them to the zoo, and show them what not to do around the lion cage...for example, climbing in...
I've never ascribed to spare the rod spoil the child, but I've started to notice that too many parents don't know how to control their children while sparing the rod. That cliche didn't become popular because children actually needed to be beaten, it became popular because parents don't know how to parent, and it's really starting to show in today's children. Namely, yours.
I hope you are making their lives miserable right now, and I cannot believe that everyone of you actually bailed your child out, (or worse, got Dr. Phil to do it for you). You obviously haven't taught your children consequences. They have beaten someone to a pulp. Knocking her unconscious, battering her face, driving off with her and dropping a girl who was completely unrecognisable off on a strange street and telling her to keep her mouth shut. Then, upon being arrested, one of them was stupid enough to ask if she would make it to cheer the next day?
That shows a complete lack of understanding as to the severity of what she had just done. She literally did not think she would get in trouble for putting someone in the hospital. She did not see her behaviour as wrong. Mercades went so far as to have a website dedicated to the crime. Bragging about doing something so terrible. I know you are surrounded by condemn for your daughters actions, and personally I think you ought to realise that there is a reason people are disgusted by what you have raised your little girl to be.
You may love her, but you need to see that her actions deserve retribution. That she needs to be taught a lesson. This time your daughters are fortunate in that no one ended up dead. But what they have just done will affect them for the rest of their lives. Imagine applying to college with that on your record. Better yet, getting a job. Employers now google the names of applicants to see what their 'online persona' is. No one is going to hire the girl that bloodied a varsity cheerleader over nothing more than a couple nasty comments.
Love your child, tell them that you understand that they don't like the consequences. But remind them that it is their actions that got them into this position. Do not give your support for what they did to Victoria. Remind them always that it was a terrible thing, that they should regret. Right now they especially need a dose of humility. If your condemn isn't enough, have them listen to the phone calls that you are receiving. I'm sure that there are dozens of people contacting you to tell you what they think. Maybe after hearing what the nation thinks of their behaviour they'll begin to understand what they have done, and god willing, feel an appropriate amount of remorse.
Labels: Dr. Phil, internet, parents responsibility, victoria lindsay, youtube myspace
posted by GamerDarling at
7:15 PM
3 Comments:
These girls are to blame, not the parents. Most likely these parents had thought they were raising upstanding young adults until this evernt.
I feel sorry for them, I'm sure some of them are upstanding pillars of the community. And now, only because there is video evidence that can be shown over and over on the television is there even an issue about it.
People fight every day. This would have never made news had this girl simply been jumped and had there been no media that could be played over and over on a Nancy Grace.
Its tragic for everyone involved. The girl, Ms. Lindsay I believe, because she has been splashed all over the television. The parents because they are totally humiliated. The grandparents and uncles are as well. Of course the girls who did the beating and the 2 guys who, lets be honest, are too goofy looking to get a decent date, happened to be dragged into this.
I don't think they really knew what they were getting into. I hope they do not go to prison. I think for ONCE girls should not be able to bat their eyes and say I'm sorry. Because thats what happens when a teacher rapes a male student. I hope the judge has the sense to not let that happen here.
I would be deeply saddened if the guys who stood watch are punished more than these girls.
I'm not holding the parents completely at fault, and they do have my pity. It's never easy to deal with this type of behaviour from your child. However I'm pointing out two, maybe three things.
a) The social media that the girls used to broadcast express themselves had nothing to do with the attack.
b) That the parents need to realise their power in the girls lives. Even though the girls are being tried as adults, they are still children. They still need the guiding hand of their parents, and whatever the parents thought they were doing up til this point obviously failed, and they need to take a look at how their parenting style needs to be adjusted. A teenager is not an adult. There is a reason that parents are legally responsible for their actions.
c) People may fight every day. But to premeditate this, and to beat the girl into the hospital on tape is another story. It's not just the fight, it's not just the tape, or the severity of the beating. It's a lack of reasonable motive combined with all of the above. These girls actually planned this out.
I'll agree that this has been sensationalised. I will not however, ever consider this to be normal or acceptable behaviour, and I do hold the parents responsible for teaching their children that this is wrong. They need to make sure that the girls understand that what they have just done is atrocious.
According to TampaBay news 10 Mercades actually had a website bragging about what she had just done. That's a complete lack of remorse, and screams the fact that her mom has yet to get her daughter to understand how badly she has behaved.
Mercades, is the one who holds the door closed on the video tape.
I'm not sure on the boys involvement. Not enough has been said...However, from Mercades holding the door shut, to the fact that they were not allowed in the house during the fight tells me that they were fairly uninvolved. More pawns than watchguards.
nice post on current affairs.
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